September 4th, 2002
|02:21 am - Gah|
I should know better not to watch Family specials.
HBO Family is having this special "parents guide" on problems Middle school kids have.
Basically focusing on the problems of 11-13 year olds.
It makes me want to scream.
Covers depression. Sex having and orientation. Violence. Skipping.
Alot seamed geared almost to piss me off.
"Put words to your tears hunny, whats making you sad."
Its just to sickly sweat and other stuff just shows how unserious theese kids are on serious topics.
Current Mood: quixotic
Dear, I started my husband-hunt at age five. I was masturbating regularly by age 9, and I was aware of my attraction to other girls by 10, though I did not connect it up with the rest of my mind officially until 14, because I was not aware that liking guys and liking girls could coexist in the same person; I thought you either had to be normal or be a lesbian.
So I don't doubt that. Some of us just mature a hell of a lot earlier than others.
I doubt that the guy was thinking, "I want to have sex with that boy over there" when he was six. Very much more likely, he was knowing that he was going to marry another boy, instead of a girl. I doubt that the kid knew what the word "gay" meant at six years old. I am aware of having been attracted to girls since age 10 or maybe earlier; I was 14 before I knew what "bisexual" meant.
I have the benefit of having journals back to when I was ten years old. I've been following my thought processes for a long time. When I was 14, before I knew what bisexual meant, I observed that I was "a slut too horny for my pants", and the only reason I hadn't gotten in serious trouble yet was because I hadn't found anybody to play with. Also around that time, I was aware that I was capable of mental states in which I could cause serious harm to myself, and I had to caution myself to be vigilant against impulses to suicide. In 1994, I bribed myself to stay alive for long enough to see the new Star Trek movie when it came out.
Now keep in mind that I was sheltered as a child.
I wrote some amazing drek when I was ten. I was also damn smart, and a damn good pattern-matcher; if I'd had the information available to me then that kids these days have at their fingertips, damn straight I would have known a lot more about myself, and how I'd act as an adult, and I would have done things just as silly.
|Date:||September 4th, 2002 07:01 am (UTC)|| |
In my first type of this post i had a line saying how alot of my problem was from the shear difference between what I went through and what they are going through.
I can barely remember being 5 and of what i do remember sexuality wasn't part of the equation. Heck even in sixth and seventh grade it wasn't part of the equation.
In roughly 8th grade i started becoming curious about dating and sexuality and such.
Which is largely contrasted to what the kids on the show were doing.
But as you said people mature differently.
And while its not a good gauge of maturity one large difference was in how some of the kids were saying they lost thier virginity at 13. More then a decade difference for me.
I'm just rambling now.
Luckily, you had time to work with a lot of other stuff before you got interested in sex.
I wonder how interrelated my sexuality and intelligence are versus yours? We're both obviously very smart and with sex on our minds a lot. I'm hypothesizing that yours may operate more independantly, while mine are inextricable.
|Date:||September 8th, 2002 01:46 pm (UTC)|| |
You know i read a phil foglio comic about that. A virus linked the higher learning and sex portions of the brain. She started solving complex physics equations while reaching climax.
but i don't think thats what you had in mind.
Interest in sex for myself did happen around puberty just a matter of the self-esteem and rationalization telling me that it wasn't a likely prospect and tried channeling it elsewhere.
Actually, that *was* what I was talking about. I find that intellectual frustration is a feeling very much akin to sexual frustration...