October 23rd, 2003
|09:54 am - Ever want to kill you friends.|
Actually I would be content to call her a duplicous drama-bitch.
Ok. heres the deal.
The group I typically fight with started a couple of years ago. 4 People started the kingdom to be a student group.
Now after the group started 2 of them dropped off the earth. They moved away but not before making a statement by literally burning thier sashes at a campout.
Now eventually the other two stopped being leaders. voted out of office or graduated (as it is a student group).
Now there is a new leadership. However the four former leaders decide they don't like how things are running (actually 2 of the 4 do this. 1 sorta does. the 4th doesn't give a shit) And black mail the current leadership.
The old guard saying if you don't do this. We are saying that you can't use the name of the kingdom or the setting.
So the new leadership decides. Hey all we are using is the name so we are going to change the name and write up our own setting.
No big deal right. well the business meeting that this happened at was rather straight forward and not alot of arguing.
Well I hang out with 2 of the 4 founders alot. and after the meeting was a scheduled game (RPG). So while over there. They start up discussion about how the group is now screwed because they don't exist in one of the national organizations.
Here is thier logic.
Group is called KOR. KOR is a group in national organization. Because group decides to not be called KOR they no longer exist in said national organization.
However founders still consider themselved to be KOR so they get all the rights and "prestige" of KOR in the organization.
I got into an argument that with them over this that almost made me walk out of that house and never return.
Why cause its a fucking name. and whats worse.
2 of these founders who care so much for the group burned thier sash saying we are not a member anymore.
the other 2 don't do jack for the group anymore. Yes they helped build it. Yes they put time and effort into it. This will only get you benefits for so long. Eventually it becomes, "thats nice, what have you done lately."
Honestly sometimes I do feel as if the only reason I hang around with them anymore is for occasional cuddling and the faint hope that I could possibly have some sort of deeper relationship with heather. Who has a lj now, rainbowspringz. She knows how I feel on this topic which is why i'm not bothering locking the entry or anything like that.
But whenever I go over there. its the same thing. We sit around but for the most part it isn't 5 people sitting in a room.
Its as if 5 people are sitting in 5 rooms. Everyone ignores everyone else with an exception or two. I've gone into this dynamic alot in previous journals. And it pisses me off.
Person A is arguing with Person B. Person C asks A question. Person A snaps at C. Causing C to be practically be crying.
I'm sick of this bullshit. This isn't how you treat friends. It's not even how you treat EX-Friends.
I think one of the real reasons this pisses me off so much is in connection to the saying about how when you dance with the devil, the devil don't change, you do. I dislike being in situations that have a negative spin. Arguments and such. And it just happens more and more.
They are my friends but how much is a friend supposed to take of selfishness, bitterness, hatefullness, and plotting against other friends.
Current Mood: aggravated
This is the point where I find a new gaming group. I've been in groups of friends like this and I've gotten tired of puting up with it. i've got one friend who slowly cycles through groups as they get tired of him.
I'm sorry to say that not everyone can meet new people as easily as I do, and I can't tell you how I do it. Just lucky I guess. I think you should go out and try though, even the search for new friends is better than trading loneliness for spite and hate.
Oh, and stop pining. I've lost a lot of opportunities due to pining for somebody (read as four girls were turned down cuz I was pining for a girl who used me) and hate to see others doing it. Heck, I now a guy who, when he finally stopped hanging out with the girl he "wanted", got two girlfriends! You never know, it can happen.
Maybe that's just in Oregon though. I think we have a surplus of gamer chicks out here.
*whisper* Just don't tell the Californians*whisper*
Yeah. They're not sounding at all like friends anymore.