November 18th, 2003
|10:49 am - Ever feel so stretched thin...|
Ok i've been losing focus (what little i've had) as of late.
Because I don't seam to ever get enough time.
Now whenever I bitch about lack of time. My brother starts saying about how i'm not cutting into my free time. Problem is a lot of my free time feels like work.
Now here is why I am stretched in 8 different directions.
Work: I work about 36-42 hours a week. Depending on load, this is me doing the typist thing.
Potential work: I have the comp guy at where I am working now talking to me about doing a graphics programming project for them. I've also done some networking and there was talk about me going on site for one of the testings next month
Potential work 2: I am one of 4 people trying to start a business. I'm the main computer guy and am trying to get a flash->asp->sqldb system up and running and i'm still dealing with the flash-> asp part. but i'm behind. i've got a meeting tonight.
Looking for work: I'm still looking for work that is what I went to school for.
Looking for school: I'm trying to get an assistantship to go back to school.
Volunteer: I'm in charge of reg for Ohayocon and have been falling behind.
Then there are the fun activities: Monday game, Monday fighting practice, tuesday fighting practice, thursday fighting practice, thursday game, wednesday game, friday game, saturday game, and weekend events.
Now these fall into three categories.
Hunt me down: Monday, Wednesday, thursday, and one of the saturday game. The people expect me to always be there.
Fighting practices : I try to go to one of them a week. typically monday or tuesday.
The thing is all of these cause stress. They didn't at first. But they have started mounding up and cause more stress. I can't figure out how to cause them not too add stress.
And to top it off I have two more stressors caused primarily by the parents. Weight and work.
Weight: I'm overweight. I'm at a new high weight and am starting yet another attempt at losing weight. But parents bringing it up doesn't help though they are paying for the attempt.
Work: I get no responses from inquiries. I barely even get brushoff letters anymore. Though i'm told its cause I don't call/follow-up strong enough. But this pressure to continue sending all the resumes.
The thing is I can't figure out how to balance the schedule and get things accomplished.
In computer terms i've started hashing. All my time is being used up on handling the jobs but not actually processing the jobs just the existance of the jobs.
So my net result of progress is 0.
Current Mood: frustrated
If the "fun" events are giving you more stress than fun, then I'd suggest re-evaluating your reasons for going to them. There could quite easily be other activities out there that you'd enjoy that wouldn't give you so much stress. By hanging on to these stressful events you're taking time away from finding things that you'd truly enjoy. I know the growing “drama” in these events have been part of the problem, but people and environments change and sometimes you have to learn to let them go when the bad begins to outweigh the good. I've most definitely made this mistake myself. A lot.
You might also need some serious personal time to evaluate your priorities in life and to simply relieve some of your stress. By keeping so busy you can't possibly give yourself enough time to relax and plan for the future.
You know that you are allowed to tell people you just don't have enough time for gaming. Right? If you have a good reason (which I know you do), you won't get a ton of shit for it. Making up silly last minute excuses, however, will give people a reason to be grumpy. It appears I will be making more time in my schedule soon enough. And if you are worried about not seeing people, arrangements can always be made.
|Date:||November 19th, 2003 10:54 pm (UTC)|| |
It partially is about seeing people. Or not seeing people.
I also can never seem to get myself relaxed. I wake up late and somewhat rushed to get to work. Work. If I slack at work I feel guilty and slightly worried that I would get fired. I get off work and its usally to try and rush to get somewhere. and then I end up falling asleep at game. or I get home and I can't sleep.
and the day repeats.
And when the week gets done I haven't accomplished half of what I wanted.
Today I've still got an upset stomach to end all. (I wasn't actually making an excuse but you realize that). And what did I end up doing, listening to the tv as I type up Ohayocon Pre-regs that i've fallen behind in.
But i'm going to try and get some sleep now. after the restroom.
I assume your schedule changing means you had a talk with him. Or is it just cause the semester is over?
I'll explain it all sometime later. I promise.